Of Eavesdropping Friends and Archery
by coral2000
Summary: Jack and Hiccup hide in the bushes to hear some of Rapunzel and Merida's girl talk. Hmm, I wonder how well that will turn out? Hinted Jackunzel and Merricup. The Big Four / Rotbtd AU.


"So… tell me all about him!" gushed Rapunzel excitedly. She was twirling around excitedly, her long blond hair fanning out behind her.

Hiccup leaned in closer to listen and almost fell forward from the bush he was hiding in. Jack yanked him back by his brown vest at the last minute.

"He's a right pervert and a total creep," answered Merida grimly, nocking her arrow and letting it fly. It, of course, hit the center of the target and she smiled.

"Macintosh? But I've seen him with a lot of girls," frowned Rapunzel.

"And his ego's large enough to drown a fleet of ships." Merida marched over to the target and yanked her arrow out of it, scowling.

"So… that's three guys who like you that you think are creeps," Rapunzel noted, frowning.

"Yeah." Merida glanced at her friend questioningly, "Why'd you ask?"

"Oh, nothing," replied Rapunzel, brushing it off before asking (somewhat nonchalantly), "So, what do you think about Hiccup?"

Hidden in the bushes, Hiccup began to cough violently and almost fell over. Jack glanced over, amused. "Careful," he murmured, "We haven't even gotten to the good part yet and we don't want to be 'found out.' Merida's got her bow and arrows with her."

Just as he said that, Merida glanced at the bushes. "Did you hear that, Punz?" she asked, arching an eyebrow.

Rapunzel's eyes lit up. "Maybe it's a bunny or something!" She grinned and looked at her friend, before regaining her composure. "I see what you're doing and it's not going to work. You've been avoiding this subject for far too long! I know you like Hiccup, Merida!"

Merida glared at the bushes in suspicion as Hiccup began to choke again. "Punz, I don't know what you're talking about. He's just our scrawny friend with a giant crush on Astrid Hofferson."

Hiccup's eyes widened. How could Merida think that?

Jack glanced at him sympathetically and patted his back.

Rapunzel came to Hiccup's rescue. "No, it's obvious he likes _you._ We're some of his best friends; you know Astrid's just a family friend of his."

"Doesn't mean he doesn't like her," Merida mumbled, shooting another arrow. But she smirked and asked loudly, "Well, how's Flynn Ryder, _Blondie_?"

Jack leaned back, eyes wide. Hiccup looked at him. Flynn was a close friend of Rapunzel's, but not the rest of theirs. He was constantly flirting with almost every girl, especially her.

"Oh, he's alright," shrugged Rapunzel, not noticing Merida's obvious jab. "He still hasn't got a girlfriend, even though tons of girls like him."

Merida laughed loudly. "Maybe you could help him with that?" she asked.

Rapunzel's eyes widened. "We're just friends, Mer!" she cried, shocked.

"Like me and Hiccup?" asked Merida pointedly.

Rapunzel frowned. "That's different! You guys like each other!"

Merida shrugged. "Jack likes you."

Concerned, Hiccup glanced at Jack again, who had stiffened. His eyes widened hugely and he looked like he was going to have a panic attack.

Rapunzel was having a similar reaction. Her green eyes were so huge they could've been out of a cartoon. "_Merida!_" she whispered, horrified. She glanced around with wide eyes, as though somebody was there (and two people were).

"What?" demanded Merida. "It was obvious anyways. Though not as obvious as you liking him."

"But he likes Elsa!" exclaimed Rapunzel desperately. Jack looked at Hiccup in confusion. When had he been sending that message across? He was only helping her in science because she was so confused and he was good at it. But that didn't mean anything, did it? He didn't have any feelings for her at all!

Merida spoke for him. "Who, Anna's sister?" she huffed, reaching for another arrow. "Elsa may be totally in love with him, but Jack only likes _you_."

Rapunzel still looked shell shocked and speechless, so Merida continued. "Anyways, did you hear how Anna's with Kristoff now? Because she liked Hans from the first day she met him, but he turned out to be a total jerk."

Rapunzel nodded, recovering quickly from her embarrassment. "Yeah… she says it's for real this time," she frowned.

"Yeah, and have you heard the story about the two boys eavesdropping on their friends who got their butts kicked?" asked Merida, grinning widely. Rapunzel smiled back, eyes sparkling with laughter.

"Yup, I might've heard that story before." And she turned straight toward the bush. "You guys have three seconds to run before Merida shoots you," she warned them.

They were out of the bush and running before she even finished her second sentence- they knew Merida never missed.

But it's not like they never tried to listen in again.


End file.
